Monday, October 8, 2012

The "I must be Happy" lie.

Have you ever noticed that the people trying to be the happy all the time are usually the most miserable?  Think about it for a minute, if you are constantly trying to be happy then you are only concerned about your own needs and satisfying yourself.  This selfish happiness ends of pushing away others and you become a lonely miserable person blaming your lack of happiness on your current conditions and other people.

Our culture, media, marketing all tell us to that we deserve to be happy and to do whatever we want to be happy.

I'm not saying being happy is a bad thing but rather it's just an emotion and if we constantly search for a single emotion then we never get to relax and be content with life's ups and downs.  Whatever gave us the idea we should be happy all the time?  Isn't it OK to be able to experience the hundreds of other emotions.

Consider the idea of happiness in marriage.  How many people do you know decided they were no longer happy being married and decided they needed a divorce to make them happy?  I know of hundreds of broken marriages and people that have gone through divorce and ended up more miserable and not to mention the misery their happiness decision caused their own kids, extended family, and friends.

To have a successful marriage, we must learn from our spouse and change.  Maybe that's why opposites attract, because we need an opposite in our life that will tell us when we are out of line and help make us a better person.  Only we have to be willing to accept compromise and be willing to change from our selfishness.

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